All right, we’ll give you a choice. You can either have… Mario Hezonja Or… this horse. We’ll take the horse When people ask you what happened here, tell them King James still rules the East. Also…tell them I’m better than Michael Jordan Someone’s coming. Wait, what? A free agent? Coming to House Hornets? We have to blow the Charlotte horn! We have to blow the Charlotte horn! Wait… Uh…what was it? One blast for a knight returning… …there’s no rider. …Two for a buyout. Three for a eunuch trying to use a lady’s chamber pot. It’s just a horse. How did you get in here? Is there any defense in this Realm anymore? He said what?! It’s Meat Pie…Mondaaay! Wah! Meat Pie Mondaaay! Hey guys? Wait, LeBron… What’s up? Your hair. Fix your hair. Oh! Thank you. Uhm…hey, guys, guys…hey, guys. Hey everyone, so glad you all could be here. I just figured since so many of you summer in Los Angeles anyway, it would be fun to invite everyone over to my new Brentwood castle for some mingling, some pampering…a little tampering. But, before we dig into our delicious fast-fired artisanal Blaze Meat Pies, I do have some big news… …Ben Simmons hit a three-pointer. Very funny. I kid, I kid…oh, speaking of which… my serv–I mean my Lord Commanders have informed me that the pies are ready so everybody say it with me…it’s time for… Meat Pie Mondaaay! Trademark pending. Does he think he invented Meat Pie Mondays? He should call it Maize Meat Pies because he is so corn—Oh! AD! Oh Kyrie, I must ask you…what are those? Oh yes. These are the new Kyrie Five boots. In honor of Ser SpongeRobert SquareTunic. Uh, so creative. You’re such an artist. Heyy…House Grumpy Boys… So you’re in Brooklyn now, eh? Indeed we are. Uh, I love it. Such a good fit. Great young core for you to demoralize. Oh! Alex Caruso’s here! Excuse me, gentlemen. Oh hey, Carmelo. How uh…what’s new with you? Oh you know…got a lot of irons in the fire. Oh yes? Are houses showing interest? No, I mean I’m actually a blacksmith now. Oh! Well, you know, I for one think you’ve been treated so unfairly by all those blog boy, media folk, analytics people. A knight of your caliber…you, ser, should be on a House… It’s ridiculous! Thank you. Uh, well, you know, if you need anyone I’m avail– Well, I mean yeah, but the problem with the House Nets is that, with the cap and all it’s– Yeah. But, uh, have you talked to Dame? Uh, I think House Blazers might be despera– …might be interested in a knight of your caliber? Ah, Ser Jayson, and Ser Jaylen, how are things? Well, you know, it’s never easy when you lose your best knight. No…it’s tough to see Al Horford on House Sixers. Hey Celtics guys…um… so I was wondering if it’s possible for me to borrow this, uh, soul box, you see, for I have a new teammate, and he is a bit, uh… Um, sorry, James, Gordon Hayward smashed it. It’s a long story… Oh, wow, OK. What even happens when you smash a soul box? Hey LeBron, just wanna say thank you so much for having us. Paul and I had a blast. Oh, are you guys leaving? Noo… We’re just about to start a big 1K tournament. Oh, I’d love to, but I actually played a game yesterday, and you know…I’m trying to manage me load, but uh– Understood. Well, so glad you guys could come and so excited for this little, “crosstown rivalry.” Remember guys, the only beef here, is in the pies! All right? Anyway, yeah, I thought the original Sea Jam was, frankly, a little overrated, OK? You’re soft. Ah! Your generation is soft. With your ‘load management,’ and your ‘analytics,’ and your ‘AAU Super Houses’, the gods of this game will not stand for this. A reckoning is coming. I thought Lola’s character was like, weirdly oversexualized. I was watching with Bronny Jr. and it was getting awkward– Whoa, what’s going on with Dion over there? Is he OK? Oh dear, I think he might have eaten my special pie. Uh, damnit JR! I just don’t understand. Why would Kawhi leave this place? It’s good, Fred. What do you mean it’s good? Kawhi showed us the way…showed us what it takes. And now it’s our North. Me. You. OG. The rest. We show the Realm we’re more than just The Claw. Wait, what the? Kawhi? Is that you? Uh…hello? I think it’s a fanling. Do you want us to sign your ball? Agh…no, no, no!